In summary on strategic communication and as we have just seen, we could say how important non-verbal communication is when we want to be attentive to strategic communication; 93% of a message is indeed outside of what is said. There is the voice, the rhythm of the voice, the tone of the voice, all the verbal language that comes to support the speech, or not, and all of this deserves great attention to observe the effects of what we mean and measure them.
The relational attitude must be strategic to succeed in saying what you want to say, to achieve the result you want to obtain and to achieve it and provoke a change in a person, make him feel that his words are not not adapted to its objective, it is necessary to know how to guide it. Knowing that she will resist.
How to communicate when you are a therapist or coach knowing that the person you have in front of you wants change but that she will be all the more resistant because she is conservative.
It is of course necessary to be in empathy, but in a strategic empathy . And to do this, adopt a complementary position in relation to his interlocutor.
If we take the example of a person who behaves like a victim, who is constantly in the complaint and if we push him to see things more positively, then he will on the contrary be locked in and be even more in the complaint.
The idea of strategic empathy involves the need to take into account what the person says, to adopt a very directive language because if we send them back, we understand why they are complaining, we see with her that everything is definitely going badly, if we are in compassion, then it is two depressed people who are facing each other.
Hearing the person's complaint, inviting them to influence their relationship, is good. This relieves her. But that often makes pschitt and she comes back saying that she can't do it. The goal is for her to be able to take action, to make an effort; it agrees but is unable to implement these efforts.
A break in empathy and the adoption of ironic language tending to make the person understand that they participate in their own misfortune through their renunciations can be beneficial.
Likewise, the techniques of persuasive communication, the strength of the aphorisms according to the profile of the person and the profile of the resistance that characterizes it work well. Confusion, which is the art of policies whose ideas seem very rational but which do not provide all the information needed to arrive at results, can also be used. If we are faced with someone very rational, we can block the excess of rationality by confusing communication
Alternative illusions : "Do you want to ask a question right away or give me another 5 minutes" that you spend listening to the person to find out what is contributing to their difficulties.
Reframing : you have had examples of this in the testimony that was given to us.
Beware of boomrang effects: what to do in the face of all the mythologies of resistance to change, to renunciations.
Paradoxes, anecdotes, metaphors, all these materials are a precious help.
